Monday, April 03, 2006

Just another day in the life of.....

Well. I've had an exciting weekend. NOT. We buried my best friend's mother Saturday. He is having a tough time (goes without saying, but I did anyway). He and I have been friends since college and the entire time I've known him, with the exception of a brief period, he has lived with his parents. (no, the movie isn't based on his life and no, he doesn't look anything like Matthew McConaughey). I mention this only to emphasize how close he was to his parents. Two years ago his father got pneumonia and never really recovered. My friend nursed his dad all of the time since, visiting him every day that he was in the hospital or in rehab. He took care of him when they took him home, fed him, bathed him, etc. until he died last December. While he loved his dad, was in the family business with him, his mom was his buddy. Her condition gradually worsened over this same time frame and he wound up having to care for both of them. When his dad died I thought that it was a blessing. His dad wasn't really there towards the end and his suffering was at an end. My friend was exhausted and I hoped that he could recoup his strength. We all prayed that his mom would improve, her loss on top of his dad would kill him. Well, she only lasted 3 months. Last Thursday I went to stay with my friend. At first he wasn't sure he wanted the company but when I walked in the door, we hugged and broke up for a few minutes and he said he was glad I came. When he wasn't with his brother and sister making arrangements for the funeral he and I hung out. We had a series of long talks about this and that, sometimes just shooting the breeze, sometimes about his folks. Between his girlfriend and myself we made sure that he got where he needed to be at the right times. Visitation was on Friday and lots of family & friends were there. He said that he felt guilty for enjoying himself getting to see everyone. The funeral was Saturday. (I found out that being the middle pallbearer means not seeing where you're going, small steps and tree limbs in the face. Just like in the cartoons, I swear.) Somehow we got through the afternoon and that evening he and I hosted friends and family at his house. He had a few too many and managed to have a good time. We puttered around the house Sunday and that evening I came home. Last night was the first night he spent alone in the house. Her presence is still strong there, the entire time I was there It felt like she was just in the next room. I'm sure its much more so for him and I'm worried about how he's handling it.

I think I'll give him a call.

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